


When Craig Hated Fanfiction

by Rytherlover



Category: South Park
Genre: Literally just the Creek vs the Creek Community, M/M, kind of spicy in some parts, tried to use tropes in this, tweek loves fanfiction about him and craig, well see how it goes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-23
Updated: 2020-07-23
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:55:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,078
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25462795
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rytherlover/pseuds/Rytherlover
Summary: When Craig tells Tweek to get a hobby, the last thing he expected was his boyfriend to start reading fanfiction about themselves.
Relationships: Craig Tucker/Tweek Tweak
Comments: 13
Kudos: 145





	When Craig Hated Fanfiction

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so I lowkey made fun of a lot of tropes in this and I just want to say I LOVE THESE TROPES! They are the thing that make me breath. So I'm not trying to hate on anyone that does these things, I just thought it would be cute to write into a story.
> 
> Enjoy!

"Ugh Craig do you have to go?" Tweek said with his arms wrapped securely around his boyfriend's body in an attempt to get him to stay put.

Craig patted the hands around his waist. "Yes Tweek. You know how my mom is if I'm out too late."

Tweek pouted and smothered his face into the noirette's back. "Can't you just spend the night?"

The taller male sighed and turned around in the hold to look down at his blonde. "I can spend the night tomorrow. I have to watch Tricia in the morning." Craig put his hands against Tweek's face his thumbs lifting up the corner of Tweek's mouth to try and get him to smile before he left.

"Ugh I'll be so bored tonight." Tweek said shaking his head to get Craig's hands off his face. "What will I do?"

Craig smirked down at the blonde and gave him a ruffle of the hair. "I'm not sure Honey, but I think this is a sign you need a hobby."

"What?" Tweek said standing up straight without leaning onto his boyfriend. "I have plenty of hobbies."

"Oh yeah? Like what?" Craig said crossing his arms, his face looking amused by the new subject.

"Like baking and...something else that I'm forgetting right now." Tweek said defiantly. "Who needs more than two hobbies anyways?"

"You do." Craig smiled at the huffing blonde and leaned down to kiss his head. "See you tomorrow night Tweek."

Tweek rolled his eyes watching his boyfriend walk out the door. "See you tomorrow."

Once the noirette left Tweek walked upstairs to his room and flopped himself on his bed with a groan. He got bored so easily that when Craig left after hanging out, he felt like anything was the same as watching paint dry. Despite the refusal to admit it, Tweek did need another hobby to occupy his time. Baking can only take up so much time and his other hobby was just looking at pictures of cute animals.

In a last ditch effort to do something with his time Tweek opened his email app on his phone and started to clean out the old emails that he didn't care to check. After he had cleaned out the boring emails he saw his spam folder had an excessive amount of crap in it, so the blonde finally tapped the icon for the spam folder and started to clean that up as well.

Then a certain header to an email caught his eye.

_Hope you like this one! I spent most of last night writing it and I think it's pretty fluffy!_

Tweek tilted his head at the familiarity of the words.

The email wasn't sent by anyone he knew as far as he knew, yet here they are writing... _something_ for him in hopes that he likes it.

He clicked on the email and it opened up to a full length story.

"Baking With The Ones You Love by Lisa Akimoto?" Tweek said to himself as he read the title of the story.

Not seeing anything better to do the blonde kept on scrolling and proceeded to read a fanfiction about him and Craig baking a cake together which was filled with plenty of kisses.

"Tweek! I'm here!" Craig called as he walked into the Tweak Residence yet unlike usual, his blonde was nowhere to be found waiting for him.

Whenever Craig was coming over Tweek would be sitting by the window waiting for him to come and leap into his arms once he did arrive, but this time there was no waiting boyfriend and he had to let himself in with the spare key. He was almost worried, but then the sound of a happy squeal subdued the worry in his heart. The blonde probably realized that he was here now and was squealing in excitement that he was here, so Craig climbed the stairs to Tweek's room and opened his door holding his arms open for the squeeze he gets from his blonde when they see each other.

"Hey Honey."

"Oh hey Craig."

Craig peeked open one of his eyes to see Tweek was sitting happily on his bed reading something on his phone.

"Uh...Hey." Craig closed the door and took the steps to Tweek's bed. "Whatcha doing?"

Tweek looked up with a smile. "Reading." Then his head went back down to his phone.

Craig quirked a brow and put his hands on his hips. "Reading what?"

"Fanfiction." Tweek answered not looking up.

Craig sat on the bed next to Tweek to look on to what he was reading. "About what?"

Tweek looked up again with an innocent tone and smile as he said. "Us."

"What?" Craig said leaning his head closer to Tweek's to see what he was reading and while looking he saw his and Tweek's name on the screen, something about them pushing each other on a swing set. Craig grabbed Tweek's phone to further inspect the story. "Where did you get this stuff?"

Tweek whined and reached for the phone, but Craig kept it just out of reach. "It was sent to me by the asian girls! Give that back I don't wanna lose my place!"

"Why would you wanna read something from the same people who got us a ball gag and handcuffs for Christmas?" Craig said tilting his head as he read the line.

_Tweek's long hair blew in the wind, the beautiful golden locks leaving Craig in a state of utter euphoria._

"Hey that was 3 years ago! They seem different now." Tweek said still reaching for his phone over the noirette.

Craig rolled his eyes. "We were fifteen! What type of people get fifteen year olds sex toys?"

"We used them so I don't know why you're complaining." Tweek finally snatched his phone back from Craig and nestled back in his seat with a small shake of the hips to get readjusted.

"I just don't understand why you're reading that crap." Craig said with a scowl crossing his arms over his chest miserably. Tweek just looked up at Craig with a smug look, Craig caught the look and glared. "What?" 

"You said that I needed a hobby anyways."

Craig walked into the diner that Tweek and him usually went to on Fridays. The two would usually order a shake and share it, but he was late because he had to drop off some drinks off at Token's bonfire as a favor. Craig saw the blonde in a corner booth by himself waiting for him and he walked over with a smile.

"Hey babe." Craig said sliding in next to Tweek and giving his forehead a kiss. 

"Hey." Tweek smiled at the kiss, but it fell after a second, his nose scrunching up as he sniffed slightly. "Huh...Interesting smell you have there."

Craig smelled himself and didn't catch anything too out of the ordinary. "What do you mean?"

Tweek leaned closer his nose just barely touching the noirette's neck as he sniffed. "You smell _smoky_." The blonde had an unimpressed look on his face when he pulled back, his eyes narrowing at his boyfriend.

"Oh, I just dropped some stuff off at Token's. He's having a bonfire." Craig said with a small nod.

"Uh-huh." Tweek side-eyed the male, his tongue poking his cheek as he gave Craig a scrutinizing glare. "Likely story."

"Uh yes...it is." Craig furrowed his brows. "Because that's what happened."

Tweek nodded unconvinced of what he was being told. "Yeah sure. If you say so."

"Is there something going on?" Craig asked unsure where the sudden hostility was coming from.

"No." Tweek said plainly as he came closer to Craig, putting his hand on his thigh then moving it up to his pockets. Patting the left one down then moving his hand across the fabric to pat down the right pocket of his jeans. "Nothing."

Craig let out a small groan at the unexpected touching of his groin area. "Tweek, this isn't exactly the place I wanna be doing this."

"What?" Tweek said raising his brow at his boyfriend.

"Don't frisk me in public, Tweek." Craig said grabbing the blonde's hand that was wandering over his crotch. "This is our favorite restaurant we don't need a reason to be banned from it. Let's just go to the car and skip the shake if you wanna do stuff."

Tweek scoffed. "I'm not trying to get it on with you. I'm just trying to check your pockets."

"Why are you trying to check my pockets?" Craig asked one of his eyebrows raising.

Tweek pulled his hand away from Craig's grip and crossed his arms, turning away with a huff. "I was checking for cigarettes."

"What? Why would you check for those? You know I don't smoke." Craig said trying to tilt his head to see the blonde's face that had been turned from him.

Tweek shrugged seeming miffed. "I don't know. You tell me. You smell like smoke and in all the stories I've been reading _apparently_ you smoke."

Craig was following the reasoning when he said you 'smell like smoke', but the understanding had been cut short at that last part. "Are you joking with me right now?"

Tweek turned around with a pissed face, his brows scrunching up and his lips squished into a small scowl. "Does it look like I'm kidding?"

"No, sorry." Craig took a breath realizing that wasn't the best wording. Tweek turned his back away from him again with a small defiant noise. "But I'm letting you know that I'm not smoking Tweek." Craig put a hand on the blonde's shoulder to try and get him to look at him again. "We've literally had a conversation about how we both would never do that because of the health risks."

"Then why would the asian girls be writing you as a chain smoker if you aren't doing it." Tweek turned back to Craig with a large frown and knit eyebrows. "Obviously they're seeing something I'm not."

Craig pinched the bridge of his nose. This blonde was going to kill him one day. Craig then said in a very calm tone to the blonde. "Let me remind you of something Tweek... **Ball gag**!"

Tweek seemed to calm down at the reminder, but still had a frown on his face. "Fine...but if I ever catch you smoking." The blonde brought his face into Craig's space with a hard glare. " _You're gonna get it_."

Craig rolled his eyes. "Deal. Whatever."

"Okay deal." Tweek seemed to perk up at the words and scooted back to Craig and pressed himself into his side, leaning his head on the noirette's shoulder. Cuddling his head into the crook Craig's neck with a happy sigh Tweek held up the menu for both of them. "So what type of shake do you want?"

The couple were having a game night with the boys but the whole time they were hanging out with Clyde, Token and Jimmy, Tweek seemed rather glum. His face having a permanent frown and every ten minutes the blonde would let out a moody sigh. His mood put a damper on the whole evening which made Craig worry for his blonde and what must have happened to cause him to be so upset, especially during weekly game night. The blue mood even calling the attention of their friends and causing Clyde and Token to ask if something happened to which Craig only shook his head.

The noirette knew that asking Tweek in a social setting what the problem was never worked because he didn't want to make his problem a public problem and expand it to his friends which Craig understood for various reasons, but in times like these the habit really bothered him. So Craig just let the blonde sulk throughout the night and decided to approach him about it later.

The couple went back to Craig's house after the games to spend the night with each other, finding it easier to make one trip to the noirette's house than two trips to drop off the blonde.

"Something happen today, Hun?" Craig said coming into the bedroom from brushing his teeth.

Tweek who was already nestled in the blankets facing the wall shook his head. "No, I'm fine."

That last part was a clear indication that the male was not fine, Craig pushed a bit more. "Are you sure?" Craig said crawling into bed behind the blonde, his arms reaching out to wrap around his boyfriend.

"Mhm. Don't worry about it." Tweek said before sighing.

Craig kissed the back of the blonde's neck and murmured against the skin. "If you say so."

The couple laid together for a few moments in silence, the noirette feeling himself drift off a bit before the small shake of Tweek's shoulders woke him up. Craig peeked a eye open trying to look over the crazy mess of yellow Tweek called hair, the blonde's eyes were squeezed shut like he want trying to keep in whatever was spilling out.

A small gasp fully alerted Craig to the new fact that Tweek might be crying.

"Tweek?" Craig pulled on the blonde's shoulder to get him to face him. "Honey, please look at me." Tweek turned around and latched onto Craig's torso like a teddy bear, a sniffle coming from the male. Craig rubbed Tweek's back gently. "What's wrong, Honey?"

"Nothing." Tweek buried his face deeper into Craig's chest and murmured into his crevice. "I'm just being dumb and overdramatic."

"No you're not." Craig hugged the blonde closer giving kisses to the top of his head. "Your feelings are valid Tweek. No matter where they stem from."

"But these ones I made myself. They wouldn't have happened if I just didn't-" The blonde let out a sob and clenched his teeth to try and get himself to stop crying.

Craig rocked the blonde in his arms, occasionally giving a tight squeeze to the small torso. Craig pulled Tweek on top of him as he laid back, knowing that Tweek seemed to feel best in this position when he was upset. The blonde's head laid against Craig's chest as he clutched the noirette's t-shirt with pained hands. Craig reached a hand into the blonde's hair stroking the scalp in small circles with the pads of his fingers.

"Wanna talk about it?"

Tweek nodded his head and slowly lifted his eyes to Craig's. "B-Before I say anything just know that I know it's dumb and I shouldn't be upset."

Craig's hand fell from Tweek's hair to his cheek, stroking the skin with his thumb. "Honey, your feelings aren't dumb."

"Well just don't be mad okay? Because I know how you hate these." Tweek said clenching the fabric in his hands tighter with a worried face.

"I promise I won't be mad." Craig smiled back.

Tweek nodded taking a moment to collect his thoughts before saying meekly. "Well...I was reading this fanfiction and in it you cheated on me and-and-an-" Tweek started to sob again and hid his crying face in Craig's chest. "A-And it said you rather date girls than me. Then I was alone f-forever."

Craig's brain short-circuited. His hands, that usually would be doing their best to soothe the blonde's worries and feelings through gentle holds or strokes, froze unmoving in the air as his mouth gaped open unable to respond to the blonde's problems.

_He was crying...because Craig cheated on him...in a made up story...and he cheated on him...with a girl._

" _Honey_." Craig said slowly, trying his best to be level-headed in the strange situation that Tweek has created with his new reading addiction. Although there really is no good way to console someone about made up problems such as watching a sad movie or reading a particularly heart wrenching book, Craig finally just sighed his hands coming to cover his face and rubbed the irritated and stunned look off his face. "I would never cheat on you and I'm also...very...very... _gay_."

Tweek sniffled and looked back up at Craig with a frown. "I-I know, b-but it's just that....Why?! Why does someone want to hurt like that o-or write that!" The blonde's cheeks puffed up as he laid on Craig. "I just want to h-hug them and make them feel better if they want to make stuff like that."

Craig groaned and repeated in a mantra. "Your feelings are valid. Your feelings are valid. Your feelings are valid. Your feelings are valid."

Tweek tilted his head. "I heard you the first time Craig. I get it my feelings matter."

The noirette paused and looked at the blonde with a tired look. "It's not for you." He then plopped his head back down on his pillow. "It's for me."

"Yeah, mom." Craig said into his phone as he walked his way to Tweek's house, they were supposed to be going to a movie for their date, but his mom thought he was lying and trying to just canoodle the blonde during this time. "I'll send you a picture when we get to the theater."

The noirette and greeted the Tweak parents then waltzed upstairs, pretty excited about the film they were about to see. Something about a man stranded on mars and having to survive on his own. 

Craig started to open the blonde's door. "Hey Tweek, ready to g-What the hell are you doing?"

Tweek sat in front of his mirror shirtless and poking at his nipples in a inquisitive manner. The view, despite the innocence the blonde possessed, made Craig feel hot underneath his collar. He was sitting on his knees and his back arched in a delicate curve of spine to hips that made Craig groan for two reasons. One, he was a healthy teen boy and loved his boyfriend dearly and two being his mom must have had witchy sensing powers that could tell today would be the day Tweek would just decide to do this act in front of his mirror.

Tweek turned towards Craig with a blush that burned to his ears, his eyes widening in shock at the sudden intrusion. "Oh! Craig! Don't you knock?!" The blonde then scrambled up from his spot on the floor and looked around for a shirt, Craig sighed a deeply pained sigh.

_Why is my boyfriend like this?_

Craig then picked up a sweater from the floor and held it up. "I'm only asking because I'll be more disturbed not knowing what was just happening."

"Well...I was jus-just testing something out." Tweek then snatched the sweater from Craig's hand to inspect if it was worth wearing or not.

Craig raised a brow. "Testing out if your nipples are real?"

"N-No!" Tweek whipped at Craig with his sweater and blushed harder. "I just wanted to see if...it would feel...No. Nevermind you'll just make fun of me."

Craig rolled his eyes at the embarrassment of a boy he's seen naked and been inside of on many occasions. "I can't with you." The noirette then pulled Tweek by the hips to him, their stomachs pressing together and making Tweek seem more shy. "You wanted to see what?"

The blonde stood in a small bubble of self-consciousness for a moment before he looked up with upturned brows. "I wanted to see if touching them would feel good."

"Your nipples?" Craig asked titling his head forward while wondering if this was a real thing happening or if this was just god testing him to see if he could get into heaven. 

Tweek nodded before pulling away to put on his sweater picked out by Craig and his floor shopping. "Yeah, but it's whatever. It doesn't, the fanfictions lied about it being all orgasmic and all that." Craig rolled his eyes at the thought of Tweek reading something where this would occur between the two of them and him thinking to himself he should try it. "It just feels like I'm poking myself. So what a bunch of liars they are."

"Really?" Craig asked skeptically. "It doesn't feel like anything?"

"Not a thing." Tweek shook his head. "I mean try it. It's nothing good."

Craig shrugged taking the blonde up on his offer and put his hand underneath the sweater, the action making the blonde yelp.

"What are you doing?" Tweek asked not turning around to face his boyfriend who was cupping at his non-existent chest.

Craig furrowed his brows. "What do you mean 'What are you doing?'? You said try it."

Tweek's flushed a deep red again. "Yeah! On _yourself_!"

"Oh...sorry." Craig started to withdrawal his hands and Tweek stopped him putting his hands over Craig's in the sweater.

"You can still try if you want to though." Tweek said rather bashfully.

Craig nonchalantly accepted the offer and let his finger brush over the small bundle on nerves. Tweek let out a shuddering breath, from the unexpected spark of feeling that washed over him. The quick action made the blonde twitch slighty. It wasn't like this when he tried. Tweek shrugged at the one-off feeling and swallowed before laughing nervously. "Heh, told you. B-Barely anything-"

"Well hold on there." Craig said smirking, his fingers gently taking Tweek's nipples into his thumbs and forefingers. "Let's give this a full chance."

Craig pinched slightly on the buds, the action making Tweek's leg a little weak and his knees dip inward. The blonde bit on his lip trying to keep whatever sounds that were trying to come from himself, in. Craig noticed the small reactions and smirked. Twisting the small pieces of flesh in his fingers. Tweek let out gasp and arched his back, his head going back against Craig's chest. The noirette leaned down and said in the blonde's ear.

"I thought you said it didn't feel like anything."

Tweek reached his hands up to cradle Craig's neck from behind him, using the new leverage to keep his knees from buckling and making him drop. "It didn't when I did it."

Craig kissed at the blonde's neck and continued to play with Tweek, his fingers giving the blonde circular strokes to the pink points. Tweek quivered from the touch, Craig leaned his head into the blonde's neck to leave faint kisses. Tweek started to pull the hair at the nape of Craig's neck as he let out small whines. Craig turned the blonde around in his arms to kiss him. Tweek re-latched his arms to Craig's neck pulling him down and closer for a better mashing of the mouths. Craig wrapped his arms around Tweek's waist, squeezing the blonde close to his body.

When they pulled away for air Tweek looked up at Craig with wide and excited eyes, stars hiding in the green abysses. What Craig least expected was for Tweek to request next. 

"Now call me a slut."

Craig was sitting with his boyfriend on the couch watching a prank show where they ranked different pranks that people submitted to the show. It didn't really itch the spot that Craig had for entertainment, but he supposed he could make do with the b-grade show. He watched a man set up a bucket of water to spill on someone else, but instead the bucket tipped prematurely and splashed the man. Craig gave the clip a quick exhale of air through his nose as a laugh.

Tweek who was engrossed in his phone smiled at the noise and said with his face still in his device. "Calm down there Craig. Laughing a bit loud."

"Oh yeah?" Craig cracked a smile at the blonde, looking over with a lean of the shoulders. "And what is it that you're doing?"

The blonde turned himself towards Craig keeping his phone screen away from Craig and his now-peering eyes. "Nothing."

Craig quirked a brow. "That's not the action of someone that's doing nothing." The noirette then reached for Tweek's phone. "Let me see. You let me see all the other weird shit you do."

"Fanfiction is different than this." Tweek said as he stretched his arm away from Craig and leaned back on his elbow to lean back even farther from the male. "You really won't like this."

Craig lunged forward, hovering over the blonde's body with his own in a quick effort to see whatever the blonde is trying to hide, the action making Tweek squeal slightly. "I'll be the judge of that." Craig gripped the phone pulling it back over to where he was sitting on the couch and his mouth literally dropped open.

"Tweek...Dear. Babe. Sugar Pie. Light of my life. Darling..." Craig said his eyes squinting closed as he clutched onto the phone in bewilderment. " _Honey_." He then opened his eyes to look at Tweek and point at the phone in his hand, making sure not to make eye contact with the image on screen. "What the fuck is this?"

Tweek looked at Craig with a guilty face unsure of how to explain the image his boyfriend had just seen, so he just shrugged and shook his head. "I really don't have a good explanation other than...The asian girls."

"Last question, even though _I think_...I know the answer." Craig said in a deeply despaired tone. "But is this supposed to be me?"

The image was of surprisingly detailed drawing of a black haired man who looked like someone had pumped him with full of steroids in all the right places. His arms almost bursting out of the blue open jacket he was wearing, the collar of it popped out to accent the thick neck that had been drawn with an even thicker Adam's apple. Beneath the jacket was a black shirt that was hiked up by large veiny hands to show of the aggressive abs that hid underneath it. Deep lines at the hips of the man ran down into the jeans that had been drawn rather low on him. His face gazed through the screen with a smize that could haunt a person. A blue chullo with a yellow puff ball at the top being bit by pearly white teeth of the man, an almost primal nature to the way his teeth chomped onto one of the flaps of the hat.

Tweek could only shake his head at the truth. "I don't think you want to know."

"Just say it." Craig said disappointed in the world and what it has become.

"Yeah." Tweek said finally coming to sit next to Craig on the couch. "It's you."

" _Jesus Christ_. I've had enough with this stuff." The noirette leaned his head back against the couch.

Tweek shrugged and leaned his head on Craig's shoulder to stare at the image some more. "I don't know. It's not _that_ bad."

Craig gave a hollow laugh at the blonde, his head poking up to looked down at the delusional boy. "Oh really? Say one good thing about this image."

"Okay. _I will_." Tweek said putting his hands around Craig's arm, to snuggle closer. "They really captured your hair and how it is just completed deflated from your hat."

" _Wow_. You know what? You're right! I don't know how I didn't notice that before." Craig quipped, the sarcastic tone making Tweek look up at him with a glare.

"Oh shut up. The only thing weird about this picture is how big they made this." Tweek then zoomed in on the obviously engorged crotch that had been highlighted by the artist through the jeans.

Craig choked out a laugh. "Actually that's the only thing that was accurate."

"Pfft! In what world?" Tweek said before he started to laugh with Craig. "I know for a fact that is not true!"

Craig held the image closer to Tweek's face. "In this world apparently!" Craig then brought the phone back to look at it when he caught glance of the description. "HA! This says that my height is 6'5!"

The couple started to howl in laughter at the phony height chart that had been given to this even faker version of Craig. The pair finding the idea of Craig being overly tall beyond amusing, their eyes beginning to brim with joyous tears. 

Tweek started to kick at the air as he gasped for air. "You're 6 foot on a good day! And this bitch said nah...6'5!"

Craig put his hand over his mouth to cover up the cackles coming from him. "Okay don't tell me shit about height when you're 5'8!"

"Oh my god! Speaking of height. You should see what they do to me in these!" Tweek said snatching the phone to pull up an image.

Craig looked over the blonde's shoulder as he pulled up the image, immediately bursting out laughing again once he saw what they had done to his boyfriend. "You look like a girl!"

"I know! I get I'm feminine sometimes, but...What the fuck?" Tweek let out a small cry as he looked at the image. "I literally almost have boobs in this!"

Craig took the phone to get a better look at the faux feminized version of Tweek.

The male's rear was facing Craig and his back was curved to create a curvaceous figure to the blonde despite the skinniness of all the other parts of the male's body. The head of a blonde man was turned over his shoulder in a shocked expression like someone had come from behind to surprise the male. His eyes were humongous and wide with glitter and other shining attributes. The man's mouth was also seemed to be wide open, but somehow still pouting with glossy pink lips that showed the tip of an equally as pink tongue. Something that almost seemed missing was the nose because of how small the artist made it, the small slope between the male's glittering eyes was hard to catch, but also completed the sultry, innocent look on the man's face. The outfit despite also being jeans somehow managed to give the man a small shine to the roundest part of a ridiculously large ass the male had. The tight button-up that gripped at odd parts of the man's body seemed to cup at the pecs of this male and gave the appearance of a womanly chest.

"Holy shit! It says you're 5 feet tall in this!" Craig laughed out.

"I told you!" Tweek started hitting at Craig's chest repetitively with the back of his hand as he laughed, his voice pitching up as he tried to speak through the chortles. "They disrespect me in these!"

"Could you imagine trying to kiss each other if I was a literal FOOT taller than you!" Craig then looked up at the ceiling and started to pucker his lips at it. "You'd have to do this."

The blonde leaned over to stare directly at the floor and said through giggles. "And you'd have to do this." Tweek then started to make kissing noises towards the floor.

Craig leaned into the blonde hiding his face in his side. "Oh my god! Stop! Could you imagine having se-"

"Boys!" Laura Tucker said storming into the room, her phone mushed against her face by her hand while she glared down at the loud couple on the couch. "Quiet down! I'm on the phone."

Craig stopped laughing and sat up on the couch to look at his mom with a suppressed smile. "Oh sorry mom."

Tweek also straightened up and cleared his throat of giggles. "Sorry Mrs. Tucker."

The woman then gave a huff of air and turned from the living room to go back to wherever she had come running from. "Sorry. What was that Tracey?"

The boys let out a collective sigh and laid back on the couch, staring at the TV that was still playing mediocre pranks and gags on it. Craig then bumped his knee into Tweek's and looked at him with a smile. Tweek looked up with an equally giddy smile before the couple came close and shared a small snicker with each other to get out the last of their laughing. 

"Mmmm."

Tweek squirmed underneath Craig as he kissed down his neck, his hands reaching under the noirette's hat to grip onto the dark locks that hid underneath. The contrast of Craig leaving long, but gentle kisses and short, but harsh bites against the blonde's skin made Tweek moan out in pleasure. Craig's cold nose trailing against his collar bone to his sternum left the blonde feeling teased and overly warm.

"Craig...I uh want to a-ask you something." Tweek said through the pleasure of the moment.

The noirette started to slowly unbutton the blonde's shirt, his lips trailing after the new skin kiss by kiss. "Hm?"

"I-I was wondering..." Tweek said before letting out a small squeak from being bit on his chest. 

"Were you now?" Craig murmured against the skin, flashing his eyes up at Tweek to smirk at the blonde. Tweek nodded nervously, the slightly worried look making Craig take the blonde more seriously. Craig came up from the blonde's chest to lean over him. Using his arms as stilts to stare down at the seemingly tense boy with a questioning smile, expecting a new suggestion to their alone time. "What is it?"

Tweek wet his lip, his eyes not meeting with his boyfriend's. The blonde's hands coming down to rest on the noirette's shoulders and play with the fabric of his t-shirt. Craig tilted his head so his face intersected the view of the shoulder that Tweek was staring at. The blonde finally looked into the noirette's eyes with a small clearing of the throat. 

"What are your future plans?"

Craig who had been in sexy mode and expecting Tweek to say something along the lines of 'time for fisting' or something like that, could only look down at his blonde with a disturbed face. When did their special evening turn into a trip to the guidance counselor's office?

"Uh...Excuse me... _What_?" 

"I know we've talked about it, but have you changed your mind at all?" Tweek said shifting under Craig, their hips brushing pleasurably and making the noirette wonder even more why this is what is happening right now.

Craig stared at Tweek for a minute waiting for the punch line or the gag that had to have been prepared, but no such thing came. "Tweek... _Hun_. This _isn't_ the time."

"Well I just thought-" Tweek was promptly cut off by Craig putting his lips on his. 

Craig pulled away with a smile. "We can talk after. Alright?"

Tweek nodded, but still seemed rather unsatisfied with the fact his questions will be delayed. "Alright."

Craig then leaned his head back down into the blonde's neck to reclaim his spot of where he was previously trailing kisses and nips. He unbuttoned another button of the blonde's shirt, revealing more of the pale skin he wanted so desperately to see. Tweek's hands went back to Craig's hair as he convulsed from the feeling of his noirette putting his mouth against a previously untouched nipple. Despite falling back into the rhythm of their love, Tweek couldn't keep his mind from thinking about those burning questions. 

"Ah I know you said later, b-but-"

Craig peeked up at Tweek with an unamused face, his face not leaving the sensitive part of the blonde's chest. "Tweek, I really hope you aren't trying to ask me about my future again."

"It's important!" Tweek said in a sudden burst of care. "If you want to do something I want to support you in any way I can."

Craig sighed against the blonde and gave the skin below him a kiss. "Thank you Hun. I appreciate that, but also..." The noirette then left his spot to touch noses with Tweek and said in a low tone. "Not _the time._ "

"Alright. Fine I'll just wait." Tweek said with a huff. "But I think that if you want to work at Nasa it would be nice of you to tell me."

Craig furrowed his brows in confusion. "What? Nasa? Tweek, why do you think I want to work at Nasa?"

"Well...you _do_ really like space." Tweek said with a shrug, his answer seeming half-there and not like his actual reasoning.

Craig pulled back his head and pressured the blonde with his gaze. "That's it?"

"Uh...No." Tweek finally said with a pout, his hands coming to cup Craig's face with an affectionate face. "It's just that in all the fanfics I read, you really seem like you want to work at Nasa and I was thinking that maybe you just don't talk about it in front of me because you know how scared I am of space and how big it is. So maybe you talked about it in front of the asain girls and they wrote it into a story."

"Okay." The noirette nodded, seemingly understanding of Tweek and his feelings before he said. "That's it."

Craig then got up from the bed and picked up his jacket, forcing his arms through the sleeves. Tweek sat up and watched as Craig put on one of his sneakers. "Craig? What are you doing?"

"I've had it with this fanfiction crap. I'm going to Lisa Whatever the Fuck's house and I'm telling her to stop." Craig finally slammed his heel into his second shoe. "They've really done it now."

"Craig that's not how it works. She isn't the ringleader or anything like that. It's a community of people." Tweek said getting up from his spot to try and coax his riled up boyfriend to sit back down. "We can go back to making out. I won't ask anymore questions."

"No Tweek, because even if we do just 'carry on' there's going to be more." Craig grabbed his phone from Tweek's desk. "They've come between our special time! Nothing's sacred anymore!"

"Craig come on! It's 11 at night! Don't bother these people." Tweek said trying to pull Craig back to bed, but the male didn't budge.

"They've bothered me way more than I'm about to bother them!"

With that final statement Craig closed the bedroom door and stormed off to go complete his new mission of stopping the Creek community. 

**Knock Knock Knock**

Craig clutched his jacket to himself, wishing he brought better weather gear because of the cold that was quite literally nipping at his nose. The noirette stood at the front of the Akimoto household and has been knocking for the past ten minute to no avail, but in Craig's mind it was worth it. To finally get Tweek off of the fanfiction and finally back onto him. "Fucking fans making me miss quality Tweek time."

Finally after another moment the door opened and revealed Lisa Akimoto who seemed both starstruck and confused as to why the noirette was at her door. "Craig? Why are you at my house?"

The male stood tall as he opened his mouth to berate this shipper. "I'm here to let you know that-"

"Oh, I know! You must be here to pick up the next chapter of 'The Martian' for Tweek!" The girl said in a happy tone. "That's so cute of you to pick it up for him."

Craig who'd been ready with a full on tirade against fanfiction and the community that has been created around his relationship as a whole, stopped as he heard the words that were being said to him. " _The Martian?_ "

"Yeah! It's the story I'm writing about you guys!" Lisa smiled as she nodded. "You're an astronaut that embarks on a space journey to find a special and valuable metal, but instead you find love from an alien named Tweek!"

"That explains the Nasa question." Craig says more to himself than to Lisa. "And I guess that does sound pretty interesting...but I came here to ask you to-"

"Oh!" Lisa then ran off from the door and came back with a medium sized painting. "As long as you're picking things up could you also give this to Tweek. Kelly Xiao made it and she'd really appreciate it if it made it to him."

Craig was about to say no and push through with his argument when Lisa handed him the painting and he was left speechless. 

It was a painting of Tweek. 

Beautiful didn't describe the way this piece of art looked to Craig, it captured every essence of the blonde in one still image. It was him looking out a window with a content expression, not a smile, but not a frown either. His proportions were so carefully sculpted to be just completely and utterly him. Even if the head were to be missing from the image, Craig would be able to tell it was supposed to be Tweek just from how he was sitting. He leaned his head on one of his hands as he gazed out the window, his eyes having a smile to them. A certain look that Craig loved to see from his blonde, but to see it handmade and captured in time so perfectly made him feel more than taken aback. 

"T-This is amazing." Craig uttered out, a flush coming to his face.

Lisa giggled at the reaction. "I'll make sure to tell Kelly you thought so. I have some other Tweek art if you want it."

"Give me everything."

"Ugh that chapter sucked!" Tweek said from Craig's arms. 

The noirette nodded in agreement. "I know. I hate slow burns. It's so obvious we like each other."

"I know right!" Tweek said with a groan. "I mean its like come on! One of you do _something!_ "

Craig tightened his hold around the blonde's waist as he rest his head on Tweek's shoulder. "Seriously."

Tweek scrolled through the comments of the story with a giggle. "Someone wrote on this one 'If they were to ever read this they'd probably hate how shy they're being.'"

"Well that person is right." Craig let out a small laugh. "Props to them."

Tweek then turned off his phone and threw it to the side. "These people really do know us."

"So what do you wanna do now?" Craig said stifling a yawn. 

The blonde grew a grin and arched his back to stretch, his arms going up to hang on Craig's neck. "Ever heard of smut?"

"No." Craig shook his head innocently. "What is it?"

Tweek then turned around in the noirette's lap to face him with a devilish smile. "Let me show you."

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so I lowkey made fun of a lot of tropes in this and I just want to say I LOVE THESE TROPES! They are the thing that make me breath. So I'm not trying to hate on anyone that does these things, I just thought it would be cute to write into a story.
> 
> '3'


End file.
